


Loss of Control

by grievingcain



Category: Gintama
Genre: Angst, Choking (Non-Sexual), M/M, Possessive Behavior, Rough Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-12
Updated: 2017-05-12
Packaged: 2018-10-31 01:18:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,096
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10888827
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grievingcain/pseuds/grievingcain
Summary: "Suddenly he had hands around his neck. He had fingers pressing his windpipe, crushing it."





	Loss of Control

**Author's Note:**

> I'm finally back with more BanTaka. I'm really happy I was able to finish one more work about my beloved OTP. I hope it's enjoyable to read.
> 
> It wasn't proofread by anyone but me, so please inform me if you find any mistake.

It was unexpected.

Suddenly he had hands around his neck. He had fingers pressing his windpipe, _crushing_ it. He couldn’t breathe.

The eye of the person on top of him were dark, their pupil was dilated. Their mouth was ajar and they breathed heavily through it as if they weren’t breathing only for themself. If Bansai could breathe he would feel the stench of alcohol the other was exhaling, but Bansai knew that despite not being completely sober, Takasugi never really lost control of himself. He always knew what he was doing.

Neither of them looked away from the other’s glare. Dark green eye stared deeply at golden ones, and the look was returned, even though Bansai’s vision was starting to blur. He couldn’t see the details of Takasugi’s features. He couldn’t see the odd mix of emotions hidden in his eye. Anger, rage, hate, jealousy, possessiveness.

For the first time he tried to speak. He couldn’t make his voice come out, and he barely made any sound when he tried to pronounce the other’s name.

“Shin…su…ke,”

Takasugi’s response was to tighten his grip. His breathing got even more labored.

“S…top,” Bansai tried to speak again.

With what was left of his strength he brought his hand to Takasugi’s arm, holding it. He lost conscious seconds after.

 

xxx

 

He woke up hours later. If he had any dreams, he couldn’t remember.

Bansai rubbed his eyes and opened them, and with a bit more effort he put himself in a sitting position on the mattress. He looked around and his eyes met Takasugi’s only one, who was sitting by the window while smoking his _kiseru_.

The memory of what happened before he fell unconscious came rushing through his mind and in an impulse he touched his own neck with both hands. He could feel a little pain if pressed, and he wondered if there was a mark.

Once again he looked at Takasugi, who now was looking through the window as if he wasn’t there.

“Shinsuke,” he called. His voice was hoarse and he coughed afterwards.

“Bansai,” the reply came instantly.

That wasn’t a kind of subject that could be avoided.

“What happened last night—” He started talking but soon he was interrupted by the other’s voice.

“You are mine.”

Takasugi’s eye was now fixed on him again. Despite the distance between them, Bansai could feel the look piercing through him.

Takasugi exhaled the smoke one last time before putting his _kiseru_ aside and getting up, only to approach Bansai and sit down on the floor right before him.

Takasugi brought his hands to Bansai’s neck once again, and didn’t change the serious expression on his face when the other man tried to move away on instinct. He put his hands around Bansai’s throat, but this time his grip wasn’t tight. It was almost a caress.

It took a few more moments until he spoke again.

“Do you understand? You are mine. You belong to me.”

Takasugi could feel Bansai’s throat moving as he swallowed. And soon he felt one of the man’s hands on top of his own.

“I understand,” he said.

Takasugi’s eye was still filled with the same emotions as before.

“Say it, then.”

Bansai didn’t hesitate.

“I’m yours. I belong to you.”

“Good.”

Takasugi withdrew his hands from Bansai’s neck, and Bansai touched it again, still feeling Takasugi’s hands lingering there.

He took a deep breath. He could swear he had never felt so relieved about _breathing_ before. And then he looked at Takasugi, who was still staring at him. Bansai still wanted an answer.

“Why?”

The question was simple. It didn’t need to be elaborated, he knew Takasugi would understand. His commander was no fool.

Takasugi seemed to ponder on the question for a while, as if he wasn’t sure how to word the answer properly.

“I wanted you to experience the same kind of pain I feel,” he finally replied.

Bansai didn’t say anything, he just nodded lightly. He felt a pang of pain on his throat when moving it, a confirmation of Takasugi’s words.

Slowly, he lifted his hand and extended his arm to touch Takasugi’s neck. His touch wasn’t rough or tight, it was just what it was: a touch. He could feel Takasugi’s pulse underneath the thin skin of his neck, the rhythm betraying the man’s hard, unchanged expression.

Bansai put both his hands around Takasugi’s neck without putting any pressure on it. Takasugi remained motionless.

But it lasted only a few seconds.

Takasugi let go of Bansai’s hands and put himself on his knees. He crawled until he was close enough to put his arms around Bansai’s shoulders. He hid his face on the curve of Bansai’s neck and started to kiss him, give him soft bites, right where his hands were pressing a few hours earlier. Not too long passed until he whispered in the other man’s ear.

“I’m gonna take you tonight.”

xxx

And he did.

His thrusts were fast, harsh, rough. His desire to cause pain as strong as his will to make his partner come undone with pleasure. When he came he made sure it was as deep as possible inside the other man, as if trying to leave a part of himself with him.

And when Bansai wasn’t done after he was, Takasugi didn’t hesitate in putting him into his mouth. He sucked as if his life depended on it, and swallowed as if his life depended on it. As he always did.

But it wasn’t enough. He wasn’t satisfied. Neither of them was.

He came again with only Bansai’s fingers inside him. And he willingly accepted when Bansai shoved his length down his throat again.

He felt something resembling completeness when Bansai pushed inside him with violence enough to rival his own, maybe even surpass it.

When they were too tired to continue, they kept their bodies touching, their mouths connected. Their tongues moved in synchrony against each other, and Bansai could taste the unspoken words on the tip of Takasugi’s tongue. As clearly as he could hear Takasugi’s song—a desperate combination of guitars and drums, as raw as something recorded in a garage, fast and brutal—he could hear those words.

_Don’t leave me._

_Stay with me._

Takasugi held him in place with arms and legs, their bodies hot and sticky with sweat and other bodily fluids. Sloppy and wet kisses still being exchanged, eyes closed to focus on the sensations. Even if only for a while, they were together.

_I’m yours._

_I belong to you._

**Author's Note:**

> I hope this made as much sense to whoever read it as it made to me. 
> 
> Thank you for reading, comments are appreciated ~


End file.
